restoring the honor of marriage

When I think of one topic that does not easily lend itself to an objective conversation, it is marriage. Communication around this topic is usually hot or cold, long or short, but seldom in the middle. My thoughts will be no different.

Married at age 25, Alicia and I told my parents, without batting an eye, that we would never argue. They smirked.  We were terribly wrong and now, we smirk. I had tasted strife and she saw her father and mother divorce. Our pain produced passion, and our faith formed an immature, but dreamy, hope. My point is that the kind of marriage we wanted was rooted in the pain of our past.
I bring this up because it can be difficult to celebrate the benefit of marriage or have an objective conversation about it without considering our own personal experiences. We usually favor or curse marriage based on the results of our own hopes and dreams.  

Leaders cannot mold their future from their pain. We must set our course with a vision of God’s best. This is why I respect Martin Luther King Jr. and those who suffered in the Civil Rights movement. Dr. King was able to extol God’s desire above personal pain. He urged America to love one another. He called on the victims of injustice, to seek the victory of brotherly love, over the bitterness of revenge.

God backs those who are willing to live beyond their pain and agree with His desire. Regardless of our current relationship status or any negative marital experiences, I believe it is an act of worship for us to yet celebrate the beauty of what God desires for our personal lives and for our city.
Dream with me for a moment and picture the beauty of a city that honors marriage.

• It empties the foster care system – children are raised by their birth parents.
• It dissolves the absentee father problem.
• It reduces drug abuse and juvenile delinquency.
• It stops teenage pregnancy, celebrates purity, and leaves no income for abortion clinics.
• It releases the potential of youth.
• It restores the two-parent home.
• It frees teachers to teach and not focus on character formation.  
• It celebrates businesses that protect the family.
• It restores generational prosperity as society requires less taxation.

I could go on, but without God, we stop dreaming of what He intended. When MLK shared his “I Have a Dream” speech, I believe God answered, because it was not a message blinded by personal pain. Those who work toward a vision that is yet limited by the blindness of their own pain and is void of God’s ultimate desire will lack His power. Oklahoma and America need an act of God, which means Oklahoma and America must openly dream God’s vision for marriage. Dream God’s dreams for our city and nation.

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Clarence Hill
Executive Director
Eye to Eye Marriage Enrichment Community